There are times when you're putting your baby to sleep, and simultaneously taking a journey down the memory lane. Nothing related to your childhood, or your Mommy's lullabies; just pondering about what you could undo and what you could have done better. You crave to fix a couple of things and torture your mind by thinking about ways to fix what you can never fix. And you want to do all this by making sure that you don't end up with a different present, because the present that you have is perfect - a loving husband and a beautiful daughter. So you quit thinking about changing the past, not because it is unchangeable, but because you are afraid of ruining your present.
I feel that I should have spent more time with parents, been less selfish, and saved more money. I can always do this now, so that five years down the line, I'm not busy thinking about undoing the past while I'm singing a lullaby for my kids.
I should have been sleeping now...
