"Oh no, not another transfer!", said Leena helplessly. Sunny smiled unsurely. He always smiled when he wanted to a) assure her that all is well and b) when he wanted to assure HIMSELF that all is well. "Oh well, I suppose this is what life is all about", said Leena consoling herself."One has to move with the times, as they say, sometimes in one city and sometimes in another; it's all for the ultimate good". "Yes, of course", said Sunny, now a little more courageously, knowing that this was his wife's way of getting around to his way of thinking.
In a matter of two weeks after this conversation, Sunny and Leena, had boarded a Mumbai-Bangalore flight, and were off to begin a new chapter of their lives,in a new city.Leena had a home-based job as an insurance agent, and Sunny worked with a Multinational company,in the software division. When their plane landed, the couple squeezed each other's hand in happiness...they had planned to do so much together: this was an opportunity for a fresh start.
From their cab, Leena peered out of the window, wide-eyed, staring at the newly built airport road,while Sunny noted the bracing climate of the place: a feature of Bangalore he had heard so much of. The couple alighted an hour later from their taxi, with their minimum luggage, as the rest of their possessions were travelling courtesy the "Roadways"....and that amounted to pretty much their sole worldy possessions. They were welcomed in by their guest house staff, and it was here that they would stay for the next two weeks: a time period fixed by Sunny's company in which they would have to find accomodation of their own. Settling down in a well-lit,neat and comfortable room, Leena plonked herself on the bed."Oh, the luxury of
stretching out...!" Sunny smiled indulgently. He loved seeing his wife happy.
The following days passed in a blur,with Sunny joining his new job, and Leena pouring over the "Free Ads" classified columns, in search of real estate agents and accomodation. All houses seemed to be described in the same language: 'Comfortable, 2 BHK accomodation, all facilities provided, near offices,schools and convenient market place, pleasant surroundings...please contact XYZ.. It was most confusing, but after buying a city map and marking out her area of interest,the houses'preferred location started getting a little clearer to identify and short list.
They saw plenty of houses. Some small, some dingy, some large from the outside, but poorly ventilated from the inside. Some houses offered views, while some,none at all. Ultimately, they stumbled across a "largish" row house. Their estate agent was most eager to show them around. " See Madam," he said as if he had struck gold. " Beautiful house, excellent location, no problem!" Leena and Sunny smiled back at him. This was the nearest they had got to liking a house, and since their stay period at the guest house was coming to an end, it was high time they had a place of their own. There was something though, about this faux red-brick facade structure that bothered her: maybe it was in the way some broken statues of Ganesh, the Elephant God, were displayed in the tiny patch of grass that passed as a lawn; maybe it was the heaviness of the air that comes with an old house, or maybe it was the quaint layout of the house which was a trifle unsettling...But they both ignored these feelings, thinking that it was just a matter of time before they adjusted to their new surroundings.
Leena settled into a state of happy domestic life, managing her home, work and taking time out to be together as a couple.The doubts remained though. It was the house they were now occupying and living in. She had heard sounds in the night, but was never sure of it's source. At times she heard a door shut suddenly, even when there was no wind. Once, she had woken up at night, to have a drink of water from the fridge,and when she switched on the light, she could have sworn there was a movement, as if, someone, sensing her arrival had just fled and gone into hiding. Most of the times, the experiences were so subtle, that she doubted herself, and credited it to her over-active imagination. She had told Sunny, but he too laughed it off. Nothing happened for weeks after this, and days passed by happily into months.
One day, as Leena entered her room during noon, she spied a little girl with long braids, playing on her bed. The girl glanced momentarily at her, and then vanished into thin air: as if she were a cloud. Leena gasped, and then felt faint. Was this the girl who resided in her house, along with them? Whose lost soul still yearned the comfort of a home and family? That evening,she waited patiently for Sunny to return from office and break the news to him.
" But that is just impossible!" said Sunny to Leena, when he heard her story."I think a holiday is the need of the day. Let's just go away to a nice, relaxed holiday where it'll be just you and I and nobody else". Leena smiled. Sunny always had a reassuring way of putting things...she already felt better.
After a ten day break in the beautiful locales of Ooty, and then Kodaikanal, the couple were back refreshed, and ready to take on the world. Happily, Leena unpacked their luggage, and got her home back in order. The weather was great, the spirits were high, and life settled down to routine.
Sunny meanwhile, had to leave town for a few days on a business trip; it was to be a short one, so Leena didn't mind at all. She'd planned to do a bit of home improvement in this short time, so it was time that wouldn't go wasted.
Three days later, when Sunny returned from home from his official trip, he rang the bell and waited for his wife to answer the door. There was no response. He tried her cell phone. There was an "unavailable" message on it. Finally, he went around the house, to the back door, and forced it open. "Leena!" he cried. "I'm home! Where are you?" There was pin drop silence. Sunny opened his bedroom door. To his amazement and horror, there sat on the bed, a little girl with long braids, playing contentedly.Seeing him,the girl vanished like a mist all at once. Sunny's terrified eyes then saw his wife lying on the floor, eyes open as if in shock, and quite dead.
Tuesday 13 December 2011
Sunday 30 October 2011
Prosaic Elegy
Frightening that the cocoon that nestled me is rupturing..all the persons I have held in awe are bidding adieus..Have they reached the black night of life or have I touched upon the orange sunset and walking on the fallen leaves of autumn in life? It is a feeling akin to being forlorn, solitary since those privy to my innermost and cataclysmic torments, pangs, traumas that come with life are saying goodbyes becoming a blur on memories. They will outlast timeless time while I shall be a forgotten poem embedded in the brood that shall carry forth the burdens of my reflections.
It was his mellifluously euphnonic sounds that enchanted me with satin silken grace and that saw me through many a tumultous phases of life, sustained me through agonies, stood as comforting witness to copious but cathartic tears and were the harbinger of melodious route to life when I started writing the enduring love story in my life. The music remains forever etched into fragile memories as a sweet melody invoking gentleness that comes subdued in the harsh blanket of life; recalled at first beckoning. The renderer of such warmth that travelled from aural to the cardiac finds peace as the body merges into earth while the soul travels into endless space. His songs were coveted gifts both for receving and giving and with his Sajda (Offering) and Mirza Ghalib, I could express all that I held precious - the words, music and a tenor to construct them into a timeless masterpiece. The symphonic notes soothed when the heart ached and rejoiced when it danced. While the dulcet tones will continue to transmit unbridled joys carrying a speck of my love story imparting the history and story of my life to my children who if they care to lend a ear to them, the person will come to my vision as an apparition.
For you, Jagjit Singh, who sang the songs to me that sowed the seeds of love in my heart that I shall nourish unto last. I shall also carry the warmth of your hug in my being as an honored memory till the last breath because only you, the singer of poems, could take another being into your fold with such affection.
Friday 30 September 2011
no place to hide
Ring-a-ling,
telephone rings,
just a message
meaningless as before,
as it will always be.
wanting me to spend
my hard earned money for
texting,
sexting greedily,
messaging illiterately,
big brother watching
but the biggest is no more
this one is bigger
not even related
imagine!
spending money
someone getting rich
spying on me
at my expense
no place private
no place to hide
And I'm paying for it all!
COPYRIGHT
09.30.2011
rwc
telephone rings,
just a message
meaningless as before,
as it will always be.
wanting me to spend
my hard earned money for
texting,
sexting greedily,
messaging illiterately,
big brother watching
but the biggest is no more
this one is bigger
not even related
imagine!
spending money
someone getting rich
spying on me
at my expense
no place private
no place to hide
And I'm paying for it all!
COPYRIGHT
09.30.2011
rwc
Monday 26 September 2011
The Lake:(A Short Story).
The lake would beckon plenty: the habitual morning walker and jogger, the frolicking children with their mothers, aunts and friends, the occasional pleasure seeker who chose a boat ride over a walk, and also those who cared more for a private moment among the greenery. Looking out at the lake from my window, I would screw up my eyes, trying to catch a view of the farthest possible distance.In fact, my changing moods seemed mirror themselves on the silken lake. When sadness enveloped me, the lake seemed grim and foreboding; when I was in a happy and upbeat mood, the lake too seemed to be in agreement. To outsiders and visitors, the lake would be a source of constant joy, envy and solace." How lucky you are to be living so close to nature!", they would exclaim, to which I'd smile knowingly. Many would want to spend their weekends near our house, and yet others contemplated shifting their residence next to ours.
Mystery and legend always seemed to surround this lake: some claimed it to be home to vile and vicious animals and reptiles, many said that it was simply dangerous and would roll their eyes mysteriously, and yet others claimed that the lake housed evil spirits. One would hear an occasional tale: a jilted lover had taken her or his life there, or someone's boat had capsized in the middle of the deep waters, never allowing any room for survivors, or, someone had seen shadowy figures which they claimed were the resident evil spirits. For this reason, not many ventured into the lake area after dark. One day, I too was witness to a curious sight: an old vintage car, with about six occupants (including an elderly couple) was trying to reverse on the narrow lake road, which led up to a dam. However, the driver of the car misjudged, and the car fell headlong into the water, with a loud splash.The lake, being in a benevolent mood, seemed to have forgiven and saved all of the family, and they all came wading out of the water, stunned but unhurt.
One evening, on my return from a long summer vacation, I was taking my dog for a walk down the lake path, when I noticed two young boys in the distance. I recognized them as the naughty boys who lived in our apartment, on the topmost floor. Seeing me approach rapidly, both ran in the opposite direction, laughing as they did so. I tried seeing where they were off to, but they had completely vanished, among the green trees.To my consternation, they were no where to be although the ripples in the lake told me that someone could have possibly jumped in only a very short while ago. "Hurry up, Fido!", I told my naughty puppy, " we have to go and tell their mother", and Fido, always on the lookout for fresh smells, reluctantly had to be dragged by the collar." Good doggy will get a biscuit!', and we half ran towards home. After Fido had had his biscuit, and been given a drink of water, I decided to take some time off and quickly inform Mrs. Z that I had seen her two boys wandering near the lake, and their consequent disappearance.
I rang the bell once. No answer. Again...no answer."Maybe she's out", I thought to myself, and decided to talk to the immediate neighbour, Liza. To my utter relief,the door opened almost immediately, and I was welcomed in warmly. As a bonus, the lady who I was actually seeking was sitting on the couch. "Hello!", Mrs. Z! I'm here to pass on some information regarding your sons..I saw them wandering in the forest of the lake."
There was a moment of pin drop silence. At last, Mrs. Z opened her mouth, and said teary eyed, "thankyou for informing me, Ruma...my two sons drowned in that lake last week when you were away". Shocked beyond words,it took me some time to realize that the two boys I had seen were actually only apparitions, who maybe had come to inform me of the tragedy that had befallen them.
Thankfully, we had to move out of the house soon after the incident.I can never forget the lake and it's everlasting mystery surrounding it.
*************END********************
Mystery and legend always seemed to surround this lake: some claimed it to be home to vile and vicious animals and reptiles, many said that it was simply dangerous and would roll their eyes mysteriously, and yet others claimed that the lake housed evil spirits. One would hear an occasional tale: a jilted lover had taken her or his life there, or someone's boat had capsized in the middle of the deep waters, never allowing any room for survivors, or, someone had seen shadowy figures which they claimed were the resident evil spirits. For this reason, not many ventured into the lake area after dark. One day, I too was witness to a curious sight: an old vintage car, with about six occupants (including an elderly couple) was trying to reverse on the narrow lake road, which led up to a dam. However, the driver of the car misjudged, and the car fell headlong into the water, with a loud splash.The lake, being in a benevolent mood, seemed to have forgiven and saved all of the family, and they all came wading out of the water, stunned but unhurt.
One evening, on my return from a long summer vacation, I was taking my dog for a walk down the lake path, when I noticed two young boys in the distance. I recognized them as the naughty boys who lived in our apartment, on the topmost floor. Seeing me approach rapidly, both ran in the opposite direction, laughing as they did so. I tried seeing where they were off to, but they had completely vanished, among the green trees.To my consternation, they were no where to be although the ripples in the lake told me that someone could have possibly jumped in only a very short while ago. "Hurry up, Fido!", I told my naughty puppy, " we have to go and tell their mother", and Fido, always on the lookout for fresh smells, reluctantly had to be dragged by the collar." Good doggy will get a biscuit!', and we half ran towards home. After Fido had had his biscuit, and been given a drink of water, I decided to take some time off and quickly inform Mrs. Z that I had seen her two boys wandering near the lake, and their consequent disappearance.
I rang the bell once. No answer. Again...no answer."Maybe she's out", I thought to myself, and decided to talk to the immediate neighbour, Liza. To my utter relief,the door opened almost immediately, and I was welcomed in warmly. As a bonus, the lady who I was actually seeking was sitting on the couch. "Hello!", Mrs. Z! I'm here to pass on some information regarding your sons..I saw them wandering in the forest of the lake."
There was a moment of pin drop silence. At last, Mrs. Z opened her mouth, and said teary eyed, "thankyou for informing me, Ruma...my two sons drowned in that lake last week when you were away". Shocked beyond words,it took me some time to realize that the two boys I had seen were actually only apparitions, who maybe had come to inform me of the tragedy that had befallen them.
Thankfully, we had to move out of the house soon after the incident.I can never forget the lake and it's everlasting mystery surrounding it.
*************END********************
Friday 23 September 2011
Open letter to Delhi boys
Few day's back i came acrossa post about Delhi Men " Open letter to Delhi Boys " a week later i saw it as a half page post in the Times of India Delhi Edition. With 2/3rd space given to that letter and 1/3rd given to a reply by someone else. Her blog alone got more than 1600 comments.She was a madrassan bitching about 'delhi' 'punjabis' & 'boys'.
She wrote a lot of stuff, bad stuff about delhi boys & north indian Culture and boasted alot about 'madraasis'. After reading all that my bloody obviously boiled and i wished if i could get hold of her and make chicken nuggets out of her skin. I saw the long list of comments, some supporting her, some criticising her and others abusing her. It suddenly struck me that, the entire post means nothing, It reminded me of what i used to do during college time. During the first year of college we all guys will sit togetherin the WIFI room and then will go to a pakistan chat room and start hurling abuses at them, self fabricated abuses to their gods, people, mother, father. Though as a group activity it was lot of fun! but was a very stupid thing to do.
I have seen a few southies in my previous company, one individual to whom i used to speak the most was a south india though he was much older to me, he still used to share his issues freely and so did i and he could hold his liquor, lot of lliquor !. In my project team there were many bengali's so much that i developed the habbit of calling everyone a 'Dah'. Working their was so much fun coz of the diversity the team offered. The bengali's will distribute some sweets in the office during some pooja karke festival, the southie christians will distribute cake to the entire department during some of their festival. Sending mails about their customs and all. Though i was given the stereotype that bengali's are shrewd, southies are intelligent & clever and cunning, Stawy away from UP people etc. The steroetype about the 'Punjabi's was they drink and are hardcore Non vegiterians. When i joined my company i neither used to drink nor eat non veg, i will be told " Tum kaisa punjabi/sardar hai .. peeta nahin non veg nahin khata, punjabi log toh sabse zyada nonveg khata hai, tumhara woh Butter chicken kaafi famous hai ( i started drinking two years back and Non veg 9 montsh back ) ". Even despite every one saying these things about every other person of the group, it never came in between us & the bond we all shared. We used to work, go out , have fun together. Diversity is so much fun !
One cannot travel to all the places of the country (some lucky bastards do ! envy.) & office is the only way to socialize with different cultures. Categorizing & genralizing is of no use as you are bound to find exceptions, and lots of them, doesnt matter what notion you have about people.
Now comming back to the blog, i actually made a list of all the points from her blog that i will counter with examples from the southern part of the country but if i know it, then so does everyone else. But she is a very good writer. & got her due recognition with half the country face-booking, tweeting and the entire Delhi reading her post in the newspaper.
PS : Subway launched a very cute small sandwich "subbie" its a cute lil, single dressing sandwich, kinda like a kiddie sandwich.
She wrote a lot of stuff, bad stuff about delhi boys & north indian Culture and boasted alot about 'madraasis'. After reading all that my bloody obviously boiled and i wished if i could get hold of her and make chicken nuggets out of her skin. I saw the long list of comments, some supporting her, some criticising her and others abusing her. It suddenly struck me that, the entire post means nothing, It reminded me of what i used to do during college time. During the first year of college we all guys will sit togetherin the WIFI room and then will go to a pakistan chat room and start hurling abuses at them, self fabricated abuses to their gods, people, mother, father. Though as a group activity it was lot of fun! but was a very stupid thing to do.
I have seen a few southies in my previous company, one individual to whom i used to speak the most was a south india though he was much older to me, he still used to share his issues freely and so did i and he could hold his liquor, lot of lliquor !. In my project team there were many bengali's so much that i developed the habbit of calling everyone a 'Dah'. Working their was so much fun coz of the diversity the team offered. The bengali's will distribute some sweets in the office during some pooja karke festival, the southie christians will distribute cake to the entire department during some of their festival. Sending mails about their customs and all. Though i was given the stereotype that bengali's are shrewd, southies are intelligent & clever and cunning, Stawy away from UP people etc. The steroetype about the 'Punjabi's was they drink and are hardcore Non vegiterians. When i joined my company i neither used to drink nor eat non veg, i will be told " Tum kaisa punjabi/sardar hai .. peeta nahin non veg nahin khata, punjabi log toh sabse zyada nonveg khata hai, tumhara woh Butter chicken kaafi famous hai ( i started drinking two years back and Non veg 9 montsh back ) ". Even despite every one saying these things about every other person of the group, it never came in between us & the bond we all shared. We used to work, go out , have fun together. Diversity is so much fun !
One cannot travel to all the places of the country (some lucky bastards do ! envy.) & office is the only way to socialize with different cultures. Categorizing & genralizing is of no use as you are bound to find exceptions, and lots of them, doesnt matter what notion you have about people.
Now comming back to the blog, i actually made a list of all the points from her blog that i will counter with examples from the southern part of the country but if i know it, then so does everyone else. But she is a very good writer. & got her due recognition with half the country face-booking, tweeting and the entire Delhi reading her post in the newspaper.
PS : Subway launched a very cute small sandwich "subbie" its a cute lil, single dressing sandwich, kinda like a kiddie sandwich.
Wednesday 21 September 2011
Old posts die
Post new while an old post dies,
In pain that medications
won't Take away
Give the pain away?
OH! If twould be so simple.
The old post dies
While pain increases
The closer to death,
The greater the pain,
Kill me now whilst I still think,
And reason with sanity.
For soon no thoughts will come
And I'll hurt forever.
Just let my last coherent thought
Be one of peace and be pain free.
copyright
20092011
rwc
In pain that medications
won't Take away
Give the pain away?
OH! If twould be so simple.
The old post dies
While pain increases
The closer to death,
The greater the pain,
Kill me now whilst I still think,
And reason with sanity.
For soon no thoughts will come
And I'll hurt forever.
Just let my last coherent thought
Be one of peace and be pain free.
copyright
20092011
rwc
Friday 16 September 2011
Life is too short to....?
"Life is too short to eat the food that you don't like." I read this one in Reader's Digest where the readers were supposed to tell what they learnt from their kids. I loved this one! :-)
Now complete the following sentence, people!
Life is too short to ____________________ .
Now complete the following sentence, people!
Life is too short to ____________________ .
Thursday 15 September 2011
Greatest Invention of Man?
People were asked what they thought was the greatest invention by man.. or woman.. mankind in general.
Electricity, said some.
Light.
Fire. (not realizing it's a discovery rather)
iPhone. (I see why Apple commands such a high respect)
Some went to the basics.
Agriculture (in its modern form)
Medicine, screamed many.
"Why, communication it is. Literature, books, sentences, words, alphabets, language." - said the old man. "Without which none of the above would be possible".
Electricity, said some.
Light.
Fire. (not realizing it's a discovery rather)
iPhone. (I see why Apple commands such a high respect)
Some went to the basics.
Agriculture (in its modern form)
Medicine, screamed many.
"Why, communication it is. Literature, books, sentences, words, alphabets, language." - said the old man. "Without which none of the above would be possible".
Wednesday 14 September 2011
Start of school
School days, good old golden rule days, new things to be learned, old things to not be forgotten.
My YGK is growing up TOO FAST! His excietment is so contagious. Being in the 3rd grade brings new responsibilities. Until now, someone had to pick him up from school every day. His Dad lives across the street from the school and down a ways. He still had to be picked up. Now he is allowed to walk "home" on the days his Dad has him. How times have changed.
For me, grade school (errr!!! elementary school as my YGK demands it be called) was 1/2 mile from home. Except in extremely bad weather, I walked to school and home. It was no big deal then. High school was 1 mile away and again, except for bad weather, I walked both ways (when I went). Now in high school, most students have a vehicle.
How times have changed - not necessarily for the better.
My YGK is growing up TOO FAST! His excietment is so contagious. Being in the 3rd grade brings new responsibilities. Until now, someone had to pick him up from school every day. His Dad lives across the street from the school and down a ways. He still had to be picked up. Now he is allowed to walk "home" on the days his Dad has him. How times have changed.
For me, grade school (errr!!! elementary school as my YGK demands it be called) was 1/2 mile from home. Except in extremely bad weather, I walked to school and home. It was no big deal then. High school was 1 mile away and again, except for bad weather, I walked both ways (when I went). Now in high school, most students have a vehicle.
How times have changed - not necessarily for the better.
Rain
Reckon my rant
caused me to pant
tonight i hear
listen to the rain
tis a different beat
getting into my brain
telling me, " for now, we have beat that terrible heat."
tain't enough to do much good
But at least the tempers are dropping in the hood.
Appreciate what you got
cause next summer, it'll again be hot.
caused me to pant
tonight i hear
listen to the rain
tis a different beat
getting into my brain
telling me, " for now, we have beat that terrible heat."
tain't enough to do much good
But at least the tempers are dropping in the hood.
Appreciate what you got
cause next summer, it'll again be hot.
Tuesday 13 September 2011
I sit and think, if we had as much rain as we do lies from politicians, the entire world would be flooded and no one would survive. No tears from angels are coming down and the ground has cracked, dry dirt being bandied about at the whim of the wind. The weatherman says that we get rain, it just evaporates before hitting the ground, only he calls it "virga." We don't want he fancy words, just simple ones will do. Time to reconnect as people which $500 words will not allow. Use the penny words and we'll reconnect again. Not talking just the weatherperson, everybody needs to do the same - politicians most of all and lawyers fall in there, too. The expensive words being used today, are cloying and drowning us all.
Saturday 10 September 2011
Resignation ;)
Today i wrote in one more resignation to HPCL I have been jumping jobs for the past 3-4 months and finally feel i am somewhere where i will stabilize.
It started coz of some stupid thoughts and the main reason was The Green Grass on the Other Side Syndrome. When i was in samsung i would hate that job, coz of reasons which feel so stupid now, and their was this rush of getting to know how it feels to put forward a resignation. It feels good actually when you do it, you feel powerful, free. The last few days in the office after you have resigned, you walk like a king, with no one able to say anything to you, everyone being in their bestest form in front of you, and then when the last day comes you feel so aweful and wonder if you can revert back.
I joined HPCL only to find out that PSU's suck big time. Their was this feeling inside of me, that if an organization takes out such a massive written test all over india followed by interviews scheduled in every corner of the country , it must be good, But the only thing good about that job, was the Money, respect & security. I was made the Retail up gradation Officer in Ahmedabad Region and job was to look after all the 180 petrol pumps in the region take care of their maintenance and modernization and construction of all new pumps in the region and to look after all the purchase activities of the Ahmedabad region.
I was initially awestruck by the amount of respect these public dealing jobs have, people double my age will come to me and talk to me like i am some politician. Every one will call me 'Sahab', the contractors licking my butt every time. In my office there were people who will are there just to move files from one table to another, there were clerks and others just to look after file work. The pantry boy will come to my desk for tea 3-4 times a day. When i will have to go for a site visit the guy will pick me up from my house and drop me back to my house. I had to look for a place to stay there and a contractor even offered me his house which was vacant.
But there was not much work to do, all i had to do was release Purchase orders, Sign Bills, and keep a track of construction activities to make sure they are completed in time. Their was nothing technical where i will have to apply my mind, It was all in all a managerial Job so i decided to leave it. Now i work at Fluor Daniel India. Its an american company, so i have alternate friday's Off ! :D that's the best part, finally settled in Gurgaon. (The place is shit!!). Company is good lots of scope for learning.
Their was a time i used to wish to get into a PSU and this year i cleared all PSU exams i sat for and suddenly it lost its charm. ;)
And just read the paper, today is the 9/11. it says 3000 people died in Attacks and after that 1,37,000 civilians have been killed in Afghanistan, Pakistan & Iraq and nearly 360 Lakh Crores INR have been spent in the war against terror.
It started coz of some stupid thoughts and the main reason was The Green Grass on the Other Side Syndrome. When i was in samsung i would hate that job, coz of reasons which feel so stupid now, and their was this rush of getting to know how it feels to put forward a resignation. It feels good actually when you do it, you feel powerful, free. The last few days in the office after you have resigned, you walk like a king, with no one able to say anything to you, everyone being in their bestest form in front of you, and then when the last day comes you feel so aweful and wonder if you can revert back.
I joined HPCL only to find out that PSU's suck big time. Their was this feeling inside of me, that if an organization takes out such a massive written test all over india followed by interviews scheduled in every corner of the country , it must be good, But the only thing good about that job, was the Money, respect & security. I was made the Retail up gradation Officer in Ahmedabad Region and job was to look after all the 180 petrol pumps in the region take care of their maintenance and modernization and construction of all new pumps in the region and to look after all the purchase activities of the Ahmedabad region.
I was initially awestruck by the amount of respect these public dealing jobs have, people double my age will come to me and talk to me like i am some politician. Every one will call me 'Sahab', the contractors licking my butt every time. In my office there were people who will are there just to move files from one table to another, there were clerks and others just to look after file work. The pantry boy will come to my desk for tea 3-4 times a day. When i will have to go for a site visit the guy will pick me up from my house and drop me back to my house. I had to look for a place to stay there and a contractor even offered me his house which was vacant.
But there was not much work to do, all i had to do was release Purchase orders, Sign Bills, and keep a track of construction activities to make sure they are completed in time. Their was nothing technical where i will have to apply my mind, It was all in all a managerial Job so i decided to leave it. Now i work at Fluor Daniel India. Its an american company, so i have alternate friday's Off ! :D that's the best part, finally settled in Gurgaon. (The place is shit!!). Company is good lots of scope for learning.
Their was a time i used to wish to get into a PSU and this year i cleared all PSU exams i sat for and suddenly it lost its charm. ;)
And just read the paper, today is the 9/11. it says 3000 people died in Attacks and after that 1,37,000 civilians have been killed in Afghanistan, Pakistan & Iraq and nearly 360 Lakh Crores INR have been spent in the war against terror.
Main Tenu Samjhavan Kiven
Came across this awesome song, A remake of the Rahat Fateh Ali Khan's famous " Main tenu Samjhavan Kiven". And Feel aa gayi ;)
Friday 9 September 2011
Positivity
Have you come across people in your office who have something negative to say all the time? Or, are complaining/whining or just being a plain old drag? I bet you have. And such a person could very well be a close friend, your parents, siblings, a relative or even a friend from many years ago you have just reconnected with on the wonderful Facebook. And I am not judging them, for who knows, the reason behind their demeanor could be deep-rooted, genuine anxiety about something in their personal lives or perhaps clinical depression starting from worries at home or at work. We all have such days when the positivity in us is simply beyond reach, despite all efforts. But let’s face it, we all know one or two individuals who moan without a cause; they complain because they can!
Perhaps the groaners and moaners were growing in number in our office lately, or perhaps we simply ran out of reasons to feel cheerful about—what with the economy, budget cuts and jobs being hacked. Whatever be it, our senior management decided that it was time for a “motivational speaker” to boost our morale and make us all feel geared up at the work front. This happened at our annual retreat recently. Following several nice speeches and a wonderful buffet lunch, we were subjected to nearly 30 minutes of motivational speech. It soon became the longest 30 minutes I have spent listening to someone delivering a speech. Her “let’s do it because you are special” spiel became insufferable and I felt like running out of the room!
However, I am determined to steer myself away from negativity, so I am going to concentrate on what I actually found nice in the talk. (And this may be something you have heard/read about somewhere – then please stop reading from this part onward!)
Can you classify yourself as one of the following? Are you a D’Grunt, a Gomo or a Smover? What are these, you say? I didn’t know, so I started following the speaker more carefully as she went on to describe the qualities of the D’Grunt (a disgruntled person), the Gomo (person going through the motions) and the Smover (a person who crosses the line and smiles and moves). So you can tell, those carriers of negativity can fall into the D’Grunt category and the “I don’t care but will go through the motions” are the bearers of the Gomo pall. I won’t go into the details, but Google Sam Parker and you can read more.
What I took away from it is what we can do to get out of this rut of negativity and lethargy that can drag us down in all walks of life – whether at home or at work. Here are a few things the speaker had listed – she admitted to have collected them from the motivational gurus out there (Seth Godin, Jon Gordon and Sam Parker, to name a few):
1. Don’t expect others to make you happy. You are the only one who can do that.
2. Focus on what you “get to do” instead of what you “have” to do.
3. Re-establish your passion and purpose.
4. Celebrate the great moments and the accomplishments.
5. Decide not to be a D’Grunt or a Gomo. Decide to be an asset.
6. Have an attitude of appreciation and say “thank you” often.
I will add to this that we should also try to celebrate the small moments and little accomplishments. What’s mine today, I ask? I managed to stay away from that giant burger at Ruggles Green Café. Should I also count my momentary happiness when I did give in to their chocolate crème brulee cheesecake? :-)
Ok, that’s it from me. I’ll leave you to ponder on these… while I go read up some more stuff written by these sage folks.
Perhaps the groaners and moaners were growing in number in our office lately, or perhaps we simply ran out of reasons to feel cheerful about—what with the economy, budget cuts and jobs being hacked. Whatever be it, our senior management decided that it was time for a “motivational speaker” to boost our morale and make us all feel geared up at the work front. This happened at our annual retreat recently. Following several nice speeches and a wonderful buffet lunch, we were subjected to nearly 30 minutes of motivational speech. It soon became the longest 30 minutes I have spent listening to someone delivering a speech. Her “let’s do it because you are special” spiel became insufferable and I felt like running out of the room!
However, I am determined to steer myself away from negativity, so I am going to concentrate on what I actually found nice in the talk. (And this may be something you have heard/read about somewhere – then please stop reading from this part onward!)
Can you classify yourself as one of the following? Are you a D’Grunt, a Gomo or a Smover? What are these, you say? I didn’t know, so I started following the speaker more carefully as she went on to describe the qualities of the D’Grunt (a disgruntled person), the Gomo (person going through the motions) and the Smover (a person who crosses the line and smiles and moves). So you can tell, those carriers of negativity can fall into the D’Grunt category and the “I don’t care but will go through the motions” are the bearers of the Gomo pall. I won’t go into the details, but Google Sam Parker and you can read more.
What I took away from it is what we can do to get out of this rut of negativity and lethargy that can drag us down in all walks of life – whether at home or at work. Here are a few things the speaker had listed – she admitted to have collected them from the motivational gurus out there (Seth Godin, Jon Gordon and Sam Parker, to name a few):
1. Don’t expect others to make you happy. You are the only one who can do that.
2. Focus on what you “get to do” instead of what you “have” to do.
3. Re-establish your passion and purpose.
4. Celebrate the great moments and the accomplishments.
5. Decide not to be a D’Grunt or a Gomo. Decide to be an asset.
6. Have an attitude of appreciation and say “thank you” often.
I will add to this that we should also try to celebrate the small moments and little accomplishments. What’s mine today, I ask? I managed to stay away from that giant burger at Ruggles Green Café. Should I also count my momentary happiness when I did give in to their chocolate crème brulee cheesecake? :-)
Ok, that’s it from me. I’ll leave you to ponder on these… while I go read up some more stuff written by these sage folks.
Ghost Story Part I and II.
It wasn't a usual kind of night: for one, the moon shone a bit too brightly in the night sky, and two, I was the lone man walking the streets. The winter air was crisp, and I could sense the vapour leaving my nostrils and mouth as I huffed and puffed up the rather long road.
I had had a long day at work, and just when office had gotten over, I eagerly ran towards my car. There was disappointment in store for me: the fuel tank was absolutely empty. Seeing my desperate state, a passerby offered me a lift in his vehicle, which I gladly accepted, and was dropped off to the nearest point from my home.
Today, the familiar looking streets took on a mysterious air. There was not a single light on at any window, and for all practical purposes, I may well have been the only living being around. The thought made me shiver. Walking all the more briskly, I turned towards the row of houses that I knew was where I lived. It was pitch dark and dead silent all around. To keep up my last shred of optimism, bravery and self respect, I walked confidently up the gate of the house that supposedly was mine. Until now. Treading slowly down the driveway, and taking extremely cautious steps towards the house entrance, I tried calling out to Trudy, my trusted friend and wife for many years. A slight chill began creeping up my spine, when I found that I didn't have enough courage to call her name out loud. Suddenly, a loud cricket started chirping, sending an electric current through the silence of the night. Somewhere very far, I sensed the baying of foxes (or was it wolves and wild dogs?)
To be continued....
I had had a long day at work, and just when office had gotten over, I eagerly ran towards my car. There was disappointment in store for me: the fuel tank was absolutely empty. Seeing my desperate state, a passerby offered me a lift in his vehicle, which I gladly accepted, and was dropped off to the nearest point from my home.
Today, the familiar looking streets took on a mysterious air. There was not a single light on at any window, and for all practical purposes, I may well have been the only living being around. The thought made me shiver. Walking all the more briskly, I turned towards the row of houses that I knew was where I lived. It was pitch dark and dead silent all around. To keep up my last shred of optimism, bravery and self respect, I walked confidently up the gate of the house that supposedly was mine. Until now. Treading slowly down the driveway, and taking extremely cautious steps towards the house entrance, I tried calling out to Trudy, my trusted friend and wife for many years. A slight chill began creeping up my spine, when I found that I didn't have enough courage to call her name out loud. Suddenly, a loud cricket started chirping, sending an electric current through the silence of the night. Somewhere very far, I sensed the baying of foxes (or was it wolves and wild dogs?)
To be continued....
Part II
The house lay completely silent. Trudy was missing, much as my mind revolted against the thought, and so was our new Labrador puppy, Frisky. I cautiously entered, and switched on the light. No electricity! The situation was becoming more complicated than I had imagined. Slowly treading up the stairs, and making my way into my room, I cautiously entered my bedroom, half expecting to see some kind of monster making himself comfortable on my bed. There were no signs of any abnormality in my room: Trudy always was a careful home maker. " Trudy?" I heard myself utter for the first time. There was no response. I opened the bathroom door too, thinking that whatever the "thing" may be, would be hiding there. My nose sensed the soothing fragrance of lilac clinging to the air: Trudy's most preferred cologne. It was funny how the "smells" of the owners stayed with them in the houses they inhabit. Although temporarily comforted at the thought, the pitch dark house seemed to be having it's last laugh on me. A sense of the eerie had overtaken me. All those movies in which giant mother ships came to suck up or steal it's inhabitants played in my head. Running down the stairs this time, I headed straight for the kitchen, attempting to make myself feel "more at home". Unsteadily, I put on the gas, attempting to make a cup of coffee. I opened one cupboard at a time, looking for the sugar, and the instant coffee powder: my mind simply had blanked out with anxiety. Suddenly, I saw it: a bright yellow POST IT, freshly pasted on the kitchen cabinet door. It read:
Darling, I'm off on a sudden camp organized by our neighbours. Will be back early next morning. Please don't worry: I'm not carrying any cell phone. OK? Take care!
The house lay completely silent. Trudy was missing, much as my mind revolted against the thought, and so was our new Labrador puppy, Frisky. I cautiously entered, and switched on the light. No electricity! The situation was becoming more complicated than I had imagined. Slowly treading up the stairs, and making my way into my room, I cautiously entered my bedroom, half expecting to see some kind of monster making himself comfortable on my bed. There were no signs of any abnormality in my room: Trudy always was a careful home maker. " Trudy?" I heard myself utter for the first time. There was no response. I opened the bathroom door too, thinking that whatever the "thing" may be, would be hiding there. My nose sensed the soothing fragrance of lilac clinging to the air: Trudy's most preferred cologne. It was funny how the "smells" of the owners stayed with them in the houses they inhabit. Although temporarily comforted at the thought, the pitch dark house seemed to be having it's last laugh on me. A sense of the eerie had overtaken me. All those movies in which giant mother ships came to suck up or steal it's inhabitants played in my head. Running down the stairs this time, I headed straight for the kitchen, attempting to make myself feel "more at home". Unsteadily, I put on the gas, attempting to make a cup of coffee. I opened one cupboard at a time, looking for the sugar, and the instant coffee powder: my mind simply had blanked out with anxiety. Suddenly, I saw it: a bright yellow POST IT, freshly pasted on the kitchen cabinet door. It read:
Darling, I'm off on a sudden camp organized by our neighbours. Will be back early next morning. Please don't worry: I'm not carrying any cell phone. OK? Take care!
*********End****************
ALTERNATE END (of Part II)
I rummaged through the cupboard, and found the elusive instant coffee powder. The thought of a hot cup of coffee made me hum, and for a while, I forgot the situation I was faced with. The problem was, that it was still quite late at night, and there was no to go for help. Even the phone lines had mysteriously died out, and that left me with little options to choose from. I went up to the living room, where Trudy and I generally spend quiet evenings in front of the TV, or playing a game of scrabble. The door to the living room creaked open, and I turned on the emergency light. Immediately, all the familiar things lit up before my eyes: our sofa, the flowery curtains, the light rug, and the lampshade, all chosen by my dear wife who, for some strange reason, had all but disappeared.
Making hesitant moves, I crept in, and went through the room, observing one item at a time. I swept aside the curtains, moved the side tables around a bit,(making more noise than necessary, to show my bravado to myself), and then, lastly, peeked under the sofa. Nothing. Running out of the house, I sat down for a while, trying to think straight. All of a sudden I saw the spectre: it was giant dark shadow, almost the size of a four-storey building, with a sack thrown across it's shoulders. Out of this sack, I saw an awful number of flailing hands and feet, of people trapped inside, all crying for help. The "spectre" was making it's way now, towards me! It had no face, a vague body and looked more of a black cloud than anythng else. Terrified, I shouted, " What's going on? Who are you? Help me, somone!" The shadow merely floated to my side, picked me up, and threw me into the same sack as the rest. Inside, I was jostled like a sack of potatoes, but through the mayhem, recognised some faces. They were of my neighbours, but I couldn't spot my wife as yet. At that point indeed, I knew not what the figure intended doing with us: we were just headed to nowhere! The unreal setting of this moment was beginning to weigh down on me, and I sincerely prayed that it was only a nightmare from which I'd wake up, sooner or later.
When my eyes opened, I was in a pitch dark hole, surrounded by corpses. Yes, corpses! There was an indescribable terror that I sensed: was I in the land of the Dead? Could things get any worse? I clambered out, and found myself in the dead of night, alone in what seemed to be a graveyard. Moving around were shadows similar to the one that had come for me. I hid behind a tombstone (not exactly a comforting thought) and thought I heard a whimper of a dog. I looked to my right, and, squinting in the darkness, saw what I recognized to be Frisky! "Frisky!". I could barely whisper. The poor animal was trapped in a small hole, and beside him lay a scarf, which I immediately recognized to be of Trudy's! Making use of the darkness, I slid up, grabbed Frisky in my arms, and, with some sixth sense, ran up to a tree. Amazingly, along with Trudy were several other women, tied up with rope, and all of them in agony. Quickly, I untied them, and although every one of us were terrified beyond imagination, managed to have the wit to stay quiet, and at the same time, run out of the terrible graveyard, which was the home to so many lost souls. At a turning up ahead, while we reached, puffing and panting, a sudden beam of sunshine blazed across the sky. Suddenly, we were back to our dear old town, in our own neighbourhood, which was bustling with the usual activity. Besides myself and Trudy, no one ever remembered the goings on of that strange night, when we were all kidnapped by unknown forces. Even now, I don't take a chance, and always sleep with a flashlight and my dog by my side.
****************************END*************************************************
Thursday 8 September 2011
Animals are no gifts
That morning u came out of ur bed so early U started to pack. U took my leash.
I was so excited.
A lil walk before we went on vacation...Yippppyyyyyy
we left with the car. U stopped,door opened.U trew a branch...
i ran and ran till i got the branch between my teeth.
But till the time i got back...u were not there anymore
I panicked ... i ran in all directions to find u, but in vain. I got weaker and weaker
suddenly a man came closer and he did a leash around me.
Very short after that i was in a cage.
I was waiting for my master. The cage went open..No No
it was not u.It was the guy who found me.
He brought me to a room with dead smell.my time was up....
Friend this is a story of so many pets
Not only during vacation time but nowadays all year trough.
Pets are seen as throw away articles.Kids get lil cats or lil dogs
But after short time its gonna be a burden.
so think before u give lil pets to lil kids.
Animals are no gifts they are living creatures,with feelings.
I was so excited.
A lil walk before we went on vacation...Yippppyyyyyy
we left with the car. U stopped,door opened.U trew a branch...
i ran and ran till i got the branch between my teeth.
But till the time i got back...u were not there anymore
I panicked ... i ran in all directions to find u, but in vain. I got weaker and weaker
suddenly a man came closer and he did a leash around me.
Very short after that i was in a cage.
I was waiting for my master. The cage went open..No No
it was not u.It was the guy who found me.
He brought me to a room with dead smell.my time was up....
Friend this is a story of so many pets
Not only during vacation time but nowadays all year trough.
Pets are seen as throw away articles.Kids get lil cats or lil dogs
But after short time its gonna be a burden.
so think before u give lil pets to lil kids.
Animals are no gifts they are living creatures,with feelings.
Wednesday 7 September 2011
First Post
I am a little confused about it..I am sure I shall be able to find my way here and indulge in writing the way I used to..
Tuesday 6 September 2011
Sleepless Mommy Nights
I wake up at 3 am, thinking that she'd wake up again, like she did yesterday and the day before yesterday. She didn't. I guess my body is used to waking up at that time. After a trip to the restroom, I lazily move around the kitchen thinking whether or not I should have a glass of water. I want to avoid another nature's call. I take a sip of water to soothe my dry throat and think about going back to sleep. My stomach grumbled. It needed a snack, I guess. But, why? I ate good at dinner. I open the refrigerator and look for something to munch. Sweet or salty? I get confused. I can't decide. I give up and ignore the sounds of my stomach. What now? I clean up the living room, arrange everything. Rearrange her toys. Everything looks fine now.
I check on her. She's sleeping peacefully. Good. I lie down besides her. I can't sleep. I remember some things to do. I realize that I forgot to put up the sticky note with my to-do list for tomorrow. I do that. I lie down again. My back hurts. I ignore it, as usual. I try to think about good things that can happen or could have happened. I think about the past and pretend to mend some things. I get bored. She moved. I get ready for a session on putting her back to sleep. She changed her position and didn't move again. I relax. She looked cute. I give a peck on her cheek. I try to think about some more good things. I sleep, finally, I don't know when.
I wake up at 5 am...
I check on her. She's sleeping peacefully. Good. I lie down besides her. I can't sleep. I remember some things to do. I realize that I forgot to put up the sticky note with my to-do list for tomorrow. I do that. I lie down again. My back hurts. I ignore it, as usual. I try to think about good things that can happen or could have happened. I think about the past and pretend to mend some things. I get bored. She moved. I get ready for a session on putting her back to sleep. She changed her position and didn't move again. I relax. She looked cute. I give a peck on her cheek. I try to think about some more good things. I sleep, finally, I don't know when.
I wake up at 5 am...
Monday 5 September 2011
Mata Pita Guru Deivam
We're alive and hopefully we all have a lot to be thankful for. So many people enter our lives forming so many relationships that it is tough to leave anyone out from the acknowledgements in our Oscar speech :)
Mata or mother is the one we hold in the highest esteem and gets our unreserved love and affection. Childbirth being what it is, there is a lot more to the relationship than just an umbilical cord. Sixth sense works more to let us know how they feel than about whether our team's gonna make the playoffs so we can win our bets ;)
Pita or father is in a commanding position in the initial stages of our lives and remains an inspiration and pivot around which the family revolves. Jeans may be our favorite wear but then without genes who are we?
Guru or teacher shape us and mould us till we are ready for this world. Picking up all the survival skills and more from them, we venture out of our comfort zones and conquer the world. It's no wonder they are right up there on the respect scale along with our parents.
But who is this Deivam? That's God!
In today's world, our friends and relatives step in and play out these roles for us at various stages in our life and I wouldn't leave out anybody. Thanks for making me who I'm today.
Sep 5 is celebrated as Teachers' Day in India.
note: this post includes previously included content from enterindia.spaces.live.com
Mata or mother is the one we hold in the highest esteem and gets our unreserved love and affection. Childbirth being what it is, there is a lot more to the relationship than just an umbilical cord. Sixth sense works more to let us know how they feel than about whether our team's gonna make the playoffs so we can win our bets ;)
Pita or father is in a commanding position in the initial stages of our lives and remains an inspiration and pivot around which the family revolves. Jeans may be our favorite wear but then without genes who are we?
Guru or teacher shape us and mould us till we are ready for this world. Picking up all the survival skills and more from them, we venture out of our comfort zones and conquer the world. It's no wonder they are right up there on the respect scale along with our parents.
But who is this Deivam? That's God!
In today's world, our friends and relatives step in and play out these roles for us at various stages in our life and I wouldn't leave out anybody. Thanks for making me who I'm today.
Sep 5 is celebrated as Teachers' Day in India.
note: this post includes previously included content from enterindia.spaces.live.com
Forgive
Ur standing at the corner of the street
ur body is a silhouette……… in the light,
i see ur hair …. all in a mess
Ur just standing there
Clothes soaking wet
U left me
I know ur sorry. tell me plzzz
I need to hear
lets start again with me….
I dont have to say I love u
When u look into my eyes
u will read
DArling i love u
Its cold without u
The night has come
Light are on
its gonna be a long night
Windows are misted
I write ur name with my fingers
its cold without u
I keep fooling myself
I hear the rain on the roof
Lights go off……………
……………………..
ur body is a silhouette……… in the light,
i see ur hair …. all in a mess
Ur just standing there
Clothes soaking wet
U left me
I know ur sorry. tell me plzzz
I need to hear
lets start again with me….
I dont have to say I love u
When u look into my eyes
u will read
DArling i love u
Its cold without u
The night has come
Light are on
its gonna be a long night
Windows are misted
I write ur name with my fingers
its cold without u
I keep fooling myself
I hear the rain on the roof
Lights go off……………
……………………..
Wednesday 31 August 2011
Absence of rain
Last night the thunder rumbled (think empty stomach but louder), the sky was dark (think black), and the air was thick with moisture. Anticipation was building, it has been quite some time since we got any rain. We did get a 24 rain earlier in the day - 24 drops of water on my windshield while waiting at a red light. I counted them before I killed them all with a flick of my wrist turning the windsield wipers on. The baked, hard-packed earth is crying out for moisture. There is no telling when it will come and when it does, will it flood the area? People still build in low-lying areas. Tomorrow another day, maybe rain, maybe not. Sunday the predicted high is 84 maybe that will be cool enough for rain.
Thanks for starting this!
It has been ages since I have written anything remotely interesting. Hopefully, Spacers Reloaded will help break that spell and I'll be able to contribute. Well, if nothing else, will love reading what you all put up :-)
- Mimi (Sushmita)
- Mimi (Sushmita)
Tuesday 30 August 2011
woohoo!
feels great to be here
and to start afresh with my spacers dear
let us hope we create the magic that was
let us keep going without a pause
:-)
and to start afresh with my spacers dear
let us hope we create the magic that was
let us keep going without a pause
:-)
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